Starting finally to do something and current circumstances

I have always been talking about making money online but never really got started until like yesterday . I just bookmarked useful links yesterday and I have not finish bookmarking all the links . I never thought that bookmarking links could take me more than an hour . there is a quite an amount of link to be bookmarked. Next thing i thought is , what if suddenly my laptop goes crazy , SHIT i have to do all those crap again . I am looking forward to buy an external hard drives to back up my files . I have started to creating some excel sheets to enter my web admin into it so as to get more organised . All this time the approach was wrong , I clearly did not like this internet thingy ,  really prefer to be playing soccer on the field , sleeping or slacking . Well considering my the situation my family is in, i think it is not wise to be doing things that i am mentioning , so i i got only to grind my teeth and get trough this shitty period of my life . I believe this tough period was a test for me and my family , hopefully we can all endure .

Going through this period , I said to myself ” I hate this , not enough money .But keep seeing bills piling up is enough to get my mother stress . I am in NS , not much i could do to make more money . Get a job outside , u are not obeying the Ns-man law . Teach tuition but my subject ain’t that great either . Somehow i really treasure my weekend time and i would not want to sell it to do other people duty for money  .  However i am not going to lay down and  just let life roll over me .

I just want to make things better for the family for now , however i know that would come with a price . The price is to stop doing all pleasurable but unproductive things . It is really easy typing but doing is totally another episode

I am really praying hard that i would have to strength to last this period and totally change my life , because I rather die than to live my life forever like this !


~ by nijnail on September 2, 2010.

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